Layla Caitlyn Gellar
by myblackkitten
Summary: A series of songfics about Caitlyn. all by flyleaf. rated t for suggested abuse.
1. Fully alive

This is my new story about camp rock. It is a collection of songfics. Please enjoy

Chapter 1: Fully Alive

**Telling Layla's story spoken  
bout how all her bones are broken  
Hammers fall on all the pieces  
Two months in the cover crease**

Caitlyn laid at the bottom of the steps not moving. Her entire body ached as if she had broke all her bones. Her father stood over her with the belt. "Oh yeah you're going to camp rock for the summer.

Goodnight Layla" "My names Caitlyn." She whispered

**Here she stands today  
In her Brilliant Shining Way**

Caitlyn looked at her cabin grinning. Home sweet home. She was sent every summer so her she could "cope." It was advised by her counselor because of her sister rachel. Who killed herself.

**Fully alive,  
More than most**

**ready to smile, and love life  
Fully alive,  
More than most, **

**ready to smile, and love life**

She opened the door and put her bags down. She saw Lola and Mitchie coming with their bags." "OMG!We are going to be roommates again." Lola screamed and hugged her. Cailtlyn just smiled.

**All my complaints shrink to nothing,  
I'm ashamed of all my somethings  
**

Nate yelled at Jason because he has poured water all over his bunk. 'Now I have to sleep in the..." he looked out of the window. He saw Caitlyn. She was Kicking a rock. Tears rolled down her cheek and he saw a huge bruise on her upper arm.

**She's glad for one day of comfort  
Only because she has suffered...**

"It's so great here." Caitlyn smiled and Nate nodded. "Sometimes I think it's way to good. To good to believe ya know?" She said and looked at him. "Why are you so happy?" He asked and she said. "Aren't I allowed to be happy once in a while?"

**Her she stands today  
In her Brilliant Shining way  
**

Caitlyn stood in front of the kids at opening jam. She opened her laptop and started tapping her keys. A beat poured from the speakers and she smiled. She stopped for a dance break and the crowd started clapping. She started tapping the keys until the end of the song. Everyone clapped and she bowed.

**Fully alive,  
More than most, ready to smile, and love life  
Fully alive,  
More than most, ready to smile, and love life  
**

She hugged mitchie and they jumped into the lake together screaming in joy. Nate sat near the edge watching.

**Fully alive,  
More than most, ready to smile, and love life  
Fully alive,  
More than most, ready to smile, and love life  
**

Caitlyn smiled at Nate and hugged him. A tear slipped down her cheek. "I'm so glad I have you." She whispered into his hair and smiled.

**Fully alive,  
More than most, ready to smile, and love life  
Fully alive,  
More than most, ready to smile, and love life**


	2. Red Sam

**Here I stand **

**empty hand**

**wishing my **

**wrist were bleeding **

**to stop the pain from the beating**

Caitlyn stood in the middle of her room with a knife propped in her hand. _One swipe and the beatings will stop. _She thought and took a deep breath. _Do it Caitlyn._ She willed herself when someone opened the door. She looked up and saw no one.

**There you stood  
Holding me  
Waiting for me to notice you  
**

She felt someone's hand slip around her. "Don't do it Caitlyn." someone whispered. She sat on the bed and they held her.

**But who are you  
You are the truth **

**I'm screaming these lies  
**

"Leave me alone please." She cried and he didn't let go. "I'm fine Nate please leave." She whimpered as she felt darkness slip over her.

**You are the truth**

**Saving my life**

"Caitlyn you don't have to do this."

"I have to it's the only was to stop it Nate."

**The warmth of your embrace  
Melts my frostbitten spirit  
You speak the truth and I hear it**

"No Caitlyn you are not slipping away from me ok?" Nate said as he rocked her. "Do you hear me?" His voice rising with anger. "Yes she whimpered

**The words are I love you  
And I have to believe in you**

"I love you Caitlyn. Do you believe me?" "Yes" she answered. He rubbed her arms feeling the heat coming from her fresh bruises.

**But who are you  
You are the truth **

**I'm screaming these liesYou are the truth **

**Saving my life**

"Caitlyn you are worth more than this. You are better than it. This isn't the answer." He gently took the knife out of her hands. "Nate this the way it has to go. I am a mistake."

**My hands are open  
And you are filling them  
Hands in the air  
In the air, in the air, in the air  
And I worship  
And I worship  
And I worship  
And I worship you**

Nate stood up and pulled something out of his pocket. It was a gold cross on a chain. "Really Caitlyn is this the answer dying? Because I don't think it is." He slipped the chain on her neck. He hugged her.

**You are the truth **

**I'm screaming these lies  
You are the truth  
Saving my life  
**

Caitlyn beat against Nate's Chest screaming ferociously. "Why won't you let me die? I hate you I hate you" Her voice turned into a whimper as she started crying. "Why won't you let me die? I hate you." She fell to her knees. "I need to die." He sank next to her.


	3. Sorrow

Chapter 3: Sorrow.

**Sometimes life seems too quiet  
Into paralyzing silence  
Like the moonless dark  
Meant to make me strong**

Caitlyn laid in the dark room. Her parents had locked her in her room. They had took her light bulb out of it's socket so she was in the dark. Knowing she was deathly afraid of the dark. She closed her eyes.

**Familiar breath of my old lies  
Changed the color in my eyes**

**Soon he will perforate the fabric of the peaceful by-and-by  
**

She felt her skin prickle as she felt her fathers breath on her neck. She whimpered. "No daddy don't" The sensation left as she heard Nate whisper into her ear. "Hey Baby"

**Sorrow lasts through this night  
I'll take this piece of you  
And hold for all eternity  
For just one second, I felt whole  
As you flew right through me  
**  
Caitlyn curled in a ball as cold seeped into her soul. The silence filled dark scared her. She blindly reached into her dresser and pulled out the necklace Nate gave her.

**Left alone with only reflections of the memory  
To face the ugly girl  
That's smothering me  
**

Caitlyn heard someone whisper "Layla I love you." Her father laid on her and she struggled. She opened her eyes to find empty space. She turned on her side and saw her sister swinging from a noose inside her closet. Her breath hitched as she felt a fist slam into her stomach. She got up and looked into her mirror. It was illuminated by a small bulb her parent's neglected to remove. There was bruises on her face and blood ran down her face. She wiped her eyes to see nothing was there except her the ugly girl.

**Sitting closer than my painHe knew each tear before it came**

**Soon he will perforate the fabric of the peaceful by-and-by**

Nate wrapped his arms around her and she tried to grab the hand that was wrapped around her. He moved his hands to her face and wiped away a tear before disappearing. She threw a lipgloss tube at the light bulb bursting it. It cutting her wrist and face.

**Sorrow lasts through this night  
I'll take this piece of you  
And hold for all eternity  
For just one second, I felt whole  
As you flew right through me**

She felt her blood slipping down her fingers from her wrist. She blinked and it disappeared**. **She gripped the necklace Nate gave her as she walked back to her bed. Her hands got sticky as blood gushed from her palm. She blinked and it remained.****

And we kiss each other one more time  
And sing this lie that's halfway mine  
This sword is slicing through the question  
So I won't be fooled by his angel light

_Nate kissed her as he walked____into Shane's apartment. "Caitlyn what happened to your face?" Shane asked She stuttered and Nate took a deep breath before saying. "I did it. I just got angry and she..." He paused bracing himself. Shane punched him and started kicking him while he was lying on the floor. "That'll teach you not to hit a girl." He said and spit on him. Nate got up and sat in the hallway._

"Caitlyn are you okay?" Nate asked her and she whispered "You're not real." _**  
**_**  
Sorrow lasts through this night  
I'll take this piece of you  
And hold for all eternity  
For just one second, I felt whole  
As you flew right through me  
And up into the stars**

"Really Caitlyn?" Nate asked and she nodded. He kissed her wounded palm and slipped the necklace around her neck. "I wish you knew." He whispered and Caitlyn said. "I'm sorry you had to tell shane you hit me." "It's okay." "But I'm not."

**  
Joy will come**

Caitlyn I love you. Please don't forget" He looked into the moonless sky. "Caitlyn everything is gonna get better.

**Sometimes life seems too quiet  
Into paralyzing silence  
Like the moonless dark  
Meant to make me strong**

Nate hugged her and a smile crept unto her face. Yeah it was dark. But that's okay because Nate was holding her and it was meant to make her strong.


	4. Much like falling

**When I said good morning  
I was lying  
I was truly thinking of  
How I might quit waking up  
**  
Caitlyn woke up and saw Nate lying next to her. "Good morning." she said. He smiled and she looked down at her wrist thinking about death

**He pointed out how selfish  
It would be to kill myself  
So I keep waking up  
**

"Caitlyn Baby what are you thinking about?" He asked and she pulled a shirt over her head. "I can't tell you." She said and he said."Caitlyn tell me." "Nate don't you have a class to be teaching." "Caitlyn now." "I was thinking about killing myself." She admitted shamefully and looked down at her fingers. "Oh honey." Nate hugged her ans said "It would be selfish for you to take away something so precious." She started crying and he held her tighter.

**It feels so much like falling  
Dying while I wait to die  
The fear of something or nothing  
Lonely empty lie**

Caitlyn laid down in her bunk and thought to herself _"I wonder how close my dad is to killing me? I wonder how close I am to killing me." _She felt emptiness gnaw at her heart and she heard someone come in. "Caitlyn is everything alright?" Mitchie asked and Caitlyn said. "Yeah could you leave me alone? Mitchie left and the gnawing got worse.

**I don't want to be a liar,  
I don't want to be selfish anymore  
I want so much to change,  
**

Mitchie I am being abused." Caitlyn whispered replaying the scene. Her door opened and she felt her bunk get heavier. "Hey baby." Nate said and she sat up. "Nate I'm being abused."

"Caitlyn I know."

"Nate I don't want to be anymore. Nate my dad molests me."

"He does what.?"

"Molests me. I don't want to lie for him anymore."

**Learning your love everyday...  
There's still so much to know  
You grip my wrists, I let go  
**

Caitlyn I love you ." "I know Nate I love you too." he kissed her shoulder and she flinched gripping her necklaces pointy edges. He grabbed her arm lightly. "I"m so sorry I forgot." He said and she said. "It's hard to do Nate. It's so hard to love you. I have a problem with trust." "Caitlyn you don't have to fear me." HE gripped her wrist and she let go of her necklace. "I'm trying to learn that."

**It feels so much like falling  
Separated from the fear  
Aware of a destination far away from here  
**

Nate picked her up bridal style and took her out of the cabin. He took her through the woods avoiding trees. He got to the edge of the lake and slowly laid her down. "You don't have to fear." She sighed and said "don't worry Nate I am far away from that." She gazed out into the ocean.

**It feels so much like falling  
Separated from the fear  
Aware of a destination far away from here  
Far away from here...  
**


End file.
